I found an understanding of Core Belief Systems powerful, and it provided me – and now I hope you – with an explanation for why we and others think, feel and behave as they do.
What Is a Core Belief System?
Deep within each of us is a set of beliefs about ourselves and our relationship to the world, and about the world itself. This set of beliefs is our core belief system. It is much like the operating system in a computer; it dictates how we respond to and function in life, how free we are to grow, learn, trust, and in general often determines if and how well we reach our potential for being fully human.
Why the Core Belief System is Important
As human beings we each operate from our core beliefs. We all make decisions, show attitudes, speak, react, feel and behave as a direct result of our inner core beliefs. The more we can identify and understand these core beliefs and how they impact us, the greater the opportunities we have to decide if our beliefs are healthy and true or if they may need to be evaluated and changed.
When we can recognize, evaluate and if appropriate, change our core beliefs, the potential exists to profoundly influence our lives and legacies, and therefore strengthen the emotional and relational health of our “Icebergs” – an LGI image of how we can see ourselves as having Outward Behaviors, the tip of the Iceberg, and underneath two layers that describe our Emotional Health and one beneath that one that describes our Relational Health.
How the Core Belief System Is Developed
The core belief system is shaped by parents and caregivers as the millions of messages they send are collected, organized and integrated within a child’s brain. Once fully in place, it can be extremely difficult to alter core beliefs, even when that child learns facts that oppose or negate some of those beliefs.
A person’s core belief system is only very primitive before they are born. In the womb the unborn child experiences warmth, is never hungry or exposed to lights and loud noises, so they might “believe” life is pretty comfortable, although a bit crowded. Once born, the baby, through a complex process over time, develops a more involved set of beliefs about themself and the world. As a child takes in messages, analyzes them as best they can, sorts them, and eventually makes basic decisions about themself, other people, their world and life in general, their core belief system is gradually being formed.
Contained in our core belief systems are decisions about how okay we are, how lovable, capable, trustworthy, worthwhile, powerful, connected, unique we are. It is here that you hold your attitudes about how safe and predictable others are, about the world and the value of life.
If children are told and shown that they are very much loved just because they exist in a family, that their needs are okay and that they can take their time to grow, pathways for these positive messages are formed. Those pathways allow similar messages to easily come to children, and over time they are able to believe that they are worthwhile, deserving people. If children are affirmed for what they can do and allowed and encouraged to build skills for thinking, doing and getting along with others, they will come to believe that they are capable.
When a child from a family like this gets to school and a teacher treats them kindly and tells them they can take their time to learn to read, that message easily travels along a familiar pathway, and they believe the teacher is speaking the truth to them. If another teacher tells them they are lazy and will never learn, that message may not be able to fully penetrate because there is no pathway for it to travel on. They can more easily believe the teacher is wrong because it goes against the core beliefs they have stored about themself.
If a child has been consistently told by parents and caregivers that they are a problem, a burden, unable to do anything or that they are a spoiled brat who always brings heartaches to their family, a pathway for negative messages will form. Later if a teacher tells them they have great potential and ability, they do not have the positive pathway to let the message in and might believe the teacher is crazy or, at least misinformed.
I will share more information about core beliefs in my next blog. 😊
Invitation for Reflection
- Is this a new concept for you? If so, how do you respond to it?
- How aware are you of your core beliefs?
- If so, what are they?
- If you are a parent or caregiver, how valuable is this information? Specifically, what will you now do?
Diane Wagenhals
Director Emeritus, Lakeside Global Institute