Summer is winding down and kids are preparing to return to school. For the youngest, it may be a completely new experience. Others are heading off to a new school, moving from elementary school to middle or high school. Some are heading off to college.
Chances are, most of these kids are experiencing some degree of anxiety, from mild to major. Most kids returning to school this fall will experience relatively minor anxiety coupled with excitement and an eagerness to be with friends and start a new adventure in life.
Then there are those kids who have trauma histories that haunt them every day, often overwhelming them with toxic beliefs about how safe they are, fears about how dangerous virtually all new experiences seem to be, and uncertainty about who to trust.
Those fears and anxieties around starting school can be activated as a result of childhood adversity. Many of you are aware of the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) research that clearly revealed the emotional damage of childhood adversity that can continue to haunt someone throughout their lifetime. According to the CDC, “ACEs are common. About 64% of adults in the United States reported they had experienced at least one type of ACE before age 18. Nearly one in six (17.3%) adults reported they had experienced four or more types of ACEs.”
And anxiety in children is getting worse. According to research from the website New Scientist, in a 2024 article entitled, “Is Anxiety Rising in Children and If So, Why?”
“Recent research suggests that childhood anxiety is on the rise, with more children feeling anxious today than even just a few years ago. As researchers start to investigate why this might be, a complicated picture is emerging, encompassing everything from the covid-19 pandemic to social media.”
“Evidence for high levels of anxiety in children comes from an analysis of 29 studies that were published between 2020 and 2021 that included 80,000 young people from around the world. It found that 20.5 per cent of children had clinically significant anxiety symptoms, with girls and older adolescents particularly affected.”
According to an article from the website WebMD.com, “Not all fear is bad. In fact, a little fear serves as an insurance policy. Without fear, we’d jump headlong into things we shouldn’t,” says Tamar E. Chansky, PhD, author of Freeing Your Child from Anxiety. Chansky is also director of the Children’s Center for OCD and Anxiety in Plymouth Meeting, PA.
“Some fear is evolutionary in nature.…For example, many children — and adults — continue to fear things outside their experience. Their brains are wired to protect them from snakes, for example, even though the average person rarely encounters a slithery serpent, venomous or not.” (The authors provide a list of common childhood anxieties and fears through the ages and stages of childhood I invite you to check out.)
Those of us who care for and about children can benefit from the following suggestions for responding to a child or adolescent’s fears and anxieties. In LGI (Lakeside Global Institute), we often use acronyms to help us remember key concepts. Our acronym LATE provides helpful approaches when responding to a child or adolescent’s fears and anxieties.
The L of LATE stands for Listening
Adults need to take time to provide opportunities for children and adolescents to describe what they are thinking, feeling, remembering and believing. Adults can make sure they are showing that they are interested in hearing what a child or adolescent has to say by attending quietly. They can then describe back to the child or adolescent the basics of what the child or adolescent is saying in order to show that they really hear and appreciate what is being said. “You are afraid it will be hard to make friends in your new school.” “You aren’t sure if you will know how to get from one class to another.” “You are afraid you might have a mean teacher.”
The A of LATE stands for Affirming
There are many ways to affirm someone, acknowledging their specific strengths, abilities, and potentials. “I have seen how often you think well on your feet.” “You are capable of assessing situations accurately which can help you make decisions about what to do.” “As you continue to learn how to interact with others, you have the potential to become a strong leader.”
The T of LATE stands for Teaching
Children and adolescents can benefit from your knowledge of some of the stresses, fears, and anxieties many of them might experience when they start school. You can share information about how common fear and anxiety are by using the research in this blog so children and adolescents know much of their anxiety and fear is normal. “A lot of research has been done about children and adolescents feeling anxious about going to school. I can share some of that with you.” “There are some skills you can use when you notice yourself becoming anxious or fearful, like using deep breathing or doodling to help yourself calm down.”
The E of LATE stands for Explore
Exploring involves using a process of inviting a child or adolescent to respond to gently stated questions that can help them gain clarity about why they are feeling afraid or anxious. “Can you remember other situations where you were fearful or anxious? How did you navigate them?” “What did you learn then that can help you now?” “Let’s brainstorm together as many possible ways we can think of that might help you anytime you are feeling fearful or anxious.”
It is also important for those caring for children and adolescents to know that those children and adolescents can be very intuitive about any fears or anxieties the adults who care for them are feeling. It is important that we all do our own work to manage our own fears and anxieties not only to help ourselves, but to also help those children and adolescents in our care who can be impacted by what they sense is happening to us.
Invitation for Reflection
- What thoughts, feelings, sensations, images, beliefs and/or memories popped up for you as you read this blog? Notice specifically any fears and anxieties you feel for yourself as well as for the children and adolescents in your care.
- What specific information or recommendations in this blog match what you think you and the children or adolescents in your life might benefit from knowing?
- What are some of the specific ways you can use each of the parts of LATE when interacting with children or adolescents in your life who might be fearful or anxious?